Why I Love Montessori

We're sending Will to a Montessori preschool next year, and I couldn't be more excited.  Since I'd never heard of Montessori before I had children, (despite a master's degree in secondary education... wish I'd had more early childhood development classes!) I thought it might be worth mentioning Montessori here.

Montessori is a style of education that focuses on letting the children be leaders in their own education.  Rather than paraphrasing better articles on what Montessori is, if you're interested in learning more you can check out the Montessori 101 page from Will's school for next year: http://www.thechildrenshouseofwellesley.com/Montessori_Childrens_House_of_Wellesley/Montessori_101.html

Things I love about Montessori:

The choice it gives children to pursue their own interests, which I believe cultivates curiosity by rewarding it, and makes education fun

The guideline for parents to "never do for your children something they could do for themselves" which has inspired me to take the time to help Will learn to do things like assist me with setting the table, clear the table, get his own shoes on, put himself down for his own nap after he has a diaper (with plenty of hugs first of course) and other things that give him a sense of pride and actually make my life easier.

The way that Will is visibly happier when he's included in things like mixing up pancakes (which he then eats more of) or putting together a step stool.  By taking the time to encourage him to learn and try things he's interested in, even when it would take me half the time to do it alone, I've increased his happiness, decreased his tantrums, and gained a little helper around the house.

When I first visited a Montessori open house, I was a little freaked out.  They had counting cubes designed for four year olds, and no toys.  Isn't childhood a time for kids to be kids?  Where are the dress up clothes?  But when I started to really think about the things that interest Will, I realized that he would love a school where he gets to make the applesauce for snack using a food mill, or learn to do laundry, or practice using a real screwdriver or vacuum cleaner.  I have plenty of things for him to play with at home.  Why not send him somewhere where they'll teach him letters if he's interested, and if he's not, he can go pour liquids, or work on different metal hinges, or other practical life skills that toddlers are intently interested in but don't always get access to.

By the time Greg and I left the open house, we were frantic to get our application in the mail.

Even if you don't decide on a Montessori preschool, there are a lot of great ways you can implement some of the Montessori ideas in your own home.  A great book is "How to Raise an Amazing Child the Montessori Way" by Tim Seldin.  Will's preschool recommended it to me, and I've already enjoyed making some changes in our home to make things more accessible for Will and help him do things "all by himself".

There's so much he's capable of doing, if I give him the chance... and it's better for both of us!

Ok they're probably not getting that clean.  But the kids are having a great time!

He loves brushing his teeth now that he has a stool to reach the sink and do it all by himself... hopefully his enthusiasm now will continue!  He can turn the water on, get his toothbrush, put toothpaste on it, and brush his teeth.  

Will can poke the egg yolks with the whisk to break them, whisk the eggs with the oil, then gently stir the dry ingredients in for pancakes.

Face-timing with Mimi

We live two states away from our children's grandparents, and it can be really hard sometimes.  Not only do we not have the support of family nearby, we also miss out on a lot of little moments where the kids are growing and learning and changing and Greg and I are watching it alone.

At the same time, it makes our trips to Maine to see family extra special events that we look forward to and talk about long afterwards.  

We're also lucky to live in a time where technology is an amazing tool for staying connected.  I email my parents, my in-laws, and even my grandparents' and Greg's grandmother photos of the kids on a regular basis.

We call often, and both sets of grandparents have an i-phone so they can Face-time with Will.

I am all about minimizing Will's screen time (he doesn't watch any t.v.) but when Will face-times with Mimi and I listen to them while I make dinner, I realize that this is the opposite of stereotypical screen time where a child is passively entertained.  They talk about their day, Will asks to see things in Mimi's house, and she walks all around and shows him things, pausing for him to process them, and then talks about them.

Will puts the phone places and plays hide and seek with her.  Mimi shows him the collection of plastic beads he likes to play with at her house, and pretends to push them through the phone.  "I got it!" I've heard Will exclaim.  "Can you send the white one, next?"  

Their conversations are filled with creativity and imagination, and real connection.  Whether Mimi is getting a ride on Will's firetruck, or showing him what her pets are doing, I know he's thinking and interacting and working on both his creative and his social skills.  

Here's what Mimi said to me about it recently in an e-mail:

When I FaceTime with Will, I often think of Mr. Rogers and how he would show something and then just let his audience look at it awhile to process it and then ask a question or say something about what he was thinking or feeling.

I try to remember to do this with Will: show all the steps when going to the attic, up the stairs, past Merry, close the door, pull down the stairs, turn on the light . . . Push the beads (imaginative play) through the phone.

You get it.

It can make for better quality screen time, I think, than just a talking head.

In today's tech, we need to practice ways to make things slow down and have more meaning.

Will is so into it that he's taught some of Mimi's tricks to his other grandparents, who now get asked to push things through the phone when they're face-timing with him!

All I know, is that it compensates a little for the hole in my heart that exists when you raise your kids apart from your own family.  It also can make a big difference in my ability to get dinner on the table without any tears.

And whenever we visit Maine, there's no question that Will and Andrew have an extremely close relationship with all their Maine family, despite the distance.  I think the phone calls, the face-times, and the postcards and mail my family sends all help.

Mimi takes Will up the bleachers for his first baseball game on a recent trip to Maine

Will's Nana is a former school teacher - she's got some great tricks up her sleeve too for connecting to kids and teaching them creativity :)  He sure loves spending time with her.

A special trip to my Dad's parents' camp with both sets of grandparents - moments we cherish 

Grampa has a lot more bravery and patience than I do!

Gardening with their great-grandmother on a week long trip to Maine in June

Homemade Canopy for the Deck

Our deck canopy, which can go up or down in about five minutes

Greg and I recently had one of those stereotypical sitcom husband/wife moments where I cornered him, smiled really hopefully, and pointed emphatically to a picture in a magazine of something I wanted him to make for me in our backyard.

http://www.marthastewart.com/971903/drop-cloth-decor#970829
(Oh, Martha... ruining men's weekends everywhere.)

"It looks easy, honey!  I know you could do this.  Wouldn't it be perfect to have more shade on the deck?!"

Meanwhile, poor Greg is probably thinking, "Here we go.  She'll never even use this.  The magazine staff had a perfect location for theirs that didn't involve putting any holes into the side of THEIR house. There goes my afternoon.  Every Sunday for a month."

Luckily for me, I was right in thinking that my engineer of a husband could most definitely figure out a way to put up a canopy on our deck so our boys would have a large shady area to play.

Luckily for Greg, he's an engineer so while his concerns about us not having the best place to attach the canopy were valid, he solved them with some ingenuity, extra poles, and zip ties.

Yay, summer!  Yay, Greg :)

The boys enjoying their shaded deck on a 90 degree day recently.
The shade keeps their feet from getting too hot on the deck as well as reducing their sun exposure.

I got my husband to drill a hole in the side of our beautiful house.
This was not easy.  He's wonderful.

Still need to paint the other half of the pole!
He attached it with zip ties so the poles can be easily removed for a gathering or at the end of the summer season. 

Andrew knew Dad needed some help.

Luckily he was on hand to give assistance.

fun with removable chalkboards

I just discovered Wallies - they're like the post-it-note of chalkboards... they're thin, removable, chalkboard stickers essentially that come in various sizes.

I love them because I can use them wherever I need to keep track of things, and remove them whenever I'd like without worrying about holes or tape marks.

Chalk is great because if Will or Andrew gets hold of it and writes on the furniture or wall, it wipes off cleanly and easily, unlike dry erase markers.

I just used them to label Will's dresser to help him pick out his own clothes more easily in the morning!  I took the 8 by 11 sheets and cut them into quarters to be a good size for labeling each half of his dresser drawer.

He loves it, despite my mediocre illustrating capabilities :)

Teaching your toddler not to be afraid of things

I am not a huge fan of spiders or bugs... especially in the house.  But when I see one while the kids are around, I try to remember how much they learn from my example.  I don't want them to be afraid of bugs because I screamed when one caught me by surprise, or take a cavalier attitude towards other living things because they saw me kill one.  So we talk about how bugs live outside, and how neat they are, and count the spider legs once I've caught them in a glass to take outside.  And if we see a bee outside, we talk about how they don't like to be touched so we need to stand back, but also that it's wonderful how they help our flowers grow.

Who ever would have thought I'd be pretending to like spiders.

The things we do for our kids, right?!

I love how this bee is helping our flowers grow.  (I actually really do love bumble bees.)

  

Putting out new toys for the morning

Recently we've started to keep our toys more organized.  We have them sorted into labeled plastic containers and in cabinets in our kitchen that have child locks on them so that the kids can't get out every single toy they own simultaneously and create chaos.

Lest this sound cruel, they can have any toy any time, as long as they put away something they're not using, first.  We try to keep only a few bins out at a time.  Cars and blocks go great together, or musical instruments and stuffed animals, for example.

This has been great for two reasons:

1. The house doesn't get as messy and the toys stay together so you can actually build an entire shape sorter or put Mr. Potato head together - so many toys are only functional when you have most of their parts!

2. The boys actually engage in more focused and creative play because they're not faced with choosing from all of their toys all at once, all the time.  When they get bored, they find something new to do with the toy that's out, rather than just switching instantly to a new toy.  I've seen my son "cook", plate, and serve the parts to one of his stacking toys for over twenty minutes, which never happened when everything he owned was out all at once.

We took it further recently and started putting something fun out for them to come down to in the morning, maybe a toy they haven't played with in a while, or something set up differently and fun for them.  Greg is best at this, and I think it's fun for everyone :)

Sometimes Greg makes such cute setups for the boys that I wish they wouldn't play with them!

Focused play

I Am Running This - My new running blog!

Great news for everyone!  I finally realized that the audience for my blog was split between parents who were excited to read about parenting, and runners who were excited to read about running.  

I started to post only half the running posts I really wanted to, because I was worried that my blog readers were getting tired of reading about running.  I thought the best solution would be a blog about running that I could post to as often as I wanted about running, and a re-focus of My New Normal to surviving (and maybe thriving?) as the mother of two young boys.  

So it's back to the craft projects, parenting lectures, meal planning, and household organization for My New Normal, and for any runners following me, I hope you'll join me on my new blog at www.iamrunningthis.com!

Thanks :)

-Kelly